Short of being nursed to sleep — something which has always proven to be supremely effective, I think most kids need some kind of prop to help them soothe themselves to sleep. Most commonly this would either be the pacifier or the thumb. Some also have some kind of security blanket or soft toy that they must have all the time or which they need to hug to sleep.
Noey is somewhat different.
He took to the pacifier early on but around the 8th month or so, he decided that he wanted nothing to do with it. Which wasn’t a bad thing. I was actually quite happy that I could avoid having to actively wean him off it. The downside was that he relied heavily on nursing to get to sleep. That and MY ELBOW.
Yes, you heard me right. How feeling up my elbow can be comforting I really cannot imagine!
He always used to make a grab for my elbow while I was nursing him and would stroke my arm and my elbow repeatedly for comfort. Now that he has stopped nursing, the elbow has been called into full time duty. “Elbow! Elbow!” he would sometimes call pitifully as he settles down in bed. Mostly I just shove it to him without him asking cos I know it would help him to settle quickly.
It is not a long term solution however. There are days when he would want to pull my elbow in a direction where it can’t possibly go because, you know, my arm is attached to my shoulder which is, in turn, attached to ME. That would result in protests and a realignment of sleeping positions would be necessary. Then there are the days when he takes forever to fall asleep and the stroking just drives me crazy, because I just can’t take the repeated pawing. And of course, when he sometimes wakes up in the middle of the night and needs an elbow, I wake up too. And can’t get back to sleep. Arrrgh. Maybe I just need my own elbow to stroke!
Now I’m scratching my head wondering how to get him off my elbow and onto something more portable. We got him a soft toy dog (which he picked out himself and christened “Rwaa-Rwaa”) which he absolutely loves, but while he would hug it in bed, it hasn’t worked to replace Mama’s elbow. The only other thing he seems equally fond of is my leg (which he frequently rolls down to and strokes too) but that wouldn’t do me any good would it? I do want to get him into his own bed soon so I need to resolve this since Mama and her elbow sure ain’t going to be fitting into Noey’s kid’s bed with Noey!
One of those many quirks that make Noey Noey!
What do your kids use to soothe them to sleep?
The elbow is new to me! Very uniquely noey. Mine loves my arm as a bolster and now just switched to holding my hand. With her on the mattress that’s placed on the floor and me on the bed, it means my whole arm becomes entirely numb on many nights.
this is too cute! Well, recently nat has started to call us to “rub rub” and we have to stroke his legs or arms before he nods off. And when he wakes in the middle of his sleep, he says “rub rub”too! So I got to do the duty. So funny la, our boys!
This is so interesting! And very sweet! Ok, only because it’s not my elbow! Haha. Raeann doesn’t seem to have any one fixed soother. Songs work (she will shake her head profusely if it’s not the thing she wants at that moment), sometimes her pillow, sometimes her Ikea toy dog, sometimes she’ll look at me sleep till she falls asleep. She tends to just fall asleep on her own.
So cute & funny… 😛 My boy likes his tummy and bolster (to cover his face) as well as company. He needs someone to lie beside him. I guess that give him comfort and security. If he wakes in the middle of night. I just need to say him. ‘I am here’ and then he will fall back to sleep again.
I’m trying to sympathetic but I cannot help giggling at this entry! opps, sorry V. Shin has not used the pacifier since birth and the way she soothes herself is to pull her t-shirt and smell her “chou-chou”, which is so convenient. She looks so cute when she’s concentrating but exasperates me because all her tops now are oversized and off-shoulder!
MG :: actually one of DD’s cousins said her son used to have a thing for her elbow when he was younger too so i know i’m not alone. and hey, at least you managed to get Sniffles off the bed though I can imagine my arm would go numb in that position as well. Ouch!
Lilsnooze :: Haha, he’s massaged to sleep! Nat really knows the good life 🙂
ROFL. sorry, this is quite funny! noey has very unique preferences. 😉
haha – Lauren has that same quirk too. We've gone on road trips where all we hear is "elbow elbow". She turned 3 yesterday and its STILL her security blanket! 🙂 <br />audrey
Hahahaha! Sorry, had to laugh! Noey's so cute and funny, but I do empathise with you…
I really enjoyed this post! <br /><br />For Xy, it's my arm. She'd stroke my arm (and that can drive me crazy), and sometimes even poke my arm pit. i've learnt to wear something with slightly tighter sleeves to deter that!
Hi there!<br /><br />My boy uses my elbow as a prop too!! I'm so "glad" in a way that I'm not the only one with a lil one that is having weird preference. :)<br /><br />I can totally identify with you that sometimes the arm + elbow just get into those near impossible postions!!<br /><br />May our lil ones get off the elbows soon!! 😀
Hi there! I've been silently reading your blog and think I should officially come up and say 'HI'! Only recently made the connection that you're issac's sister (such a small world!) – not sure if issac has told you about my little boy Aidan, but my boy totally adores your brother! Issac's such a wonderful big brother to Aidan in church!<br /><br />Anyway, just to share,
audrey :: 3 years old and still the elbow?? noooo… <br /><br />cabby :: well, thanks 🙂 he can be quite a character, this noey.<br /><br />sockling :: the stroking drives me crazy too so i understand how you feel! really need to move these kids on to something non-human (or at least, non-mummy!)<br /><br />Jo :: Ah! You too!!! If you chance on any good alternatives, PLEASE let me know. (And
Just like everyone else has said, Noey is so funny! 🙂 Bubbles uses her left thumb but recently when she had a cut on her hand we had to bandage it and she was left to 'fend' for herself. She ended up scratching her head to sleep! She once also patted a tissue box to sleep =P
hahahahaha i'm so sorry babe! but i really cant stop laughing!!! hahahahahahaha he's so cute lah! but your poor elbow!
That is so cute! Luckily for me, Caitlin’s attached to something a bit more portable (and detachable)! She’s got her cloth which she smells and her soother which I’m hoping to wean off soon but I fear a losing battle ahead! Now that she’s more vocal, she calls out for her “coff” and “suckaa” before she goes to sleep… 🙂
i know it’s not nice to laugh, but i burst out laughing reading this post. elbow?! like seriously? too cute lah, noey is. but then again, i’m sure it must be frustrating at times when you want some time to yourself without being a security blanket for your child. but still…elbow. hmm…maybe noey will grow up having an elbow fetish. hee… 😉
LOL!! But seriously, elbow is not the weirdest I’ve come across! My friend had to contend with her daughter pinching her nose for a good couple of years!!!! Shn is just a chou-chou (ie: Bolster) person – which I think is a similar soothing prop to elbow. U cld try offering him a bolster instead so at least you don’t have to tolerate the stroking and clawing!!
Corsage :: I told DD that I hope my next baby with be a thumb sucker. It brings it’s own problems, but they are the best sleepers!
Daph :: Yes yes, wait till it’s your turn!
Ker :: You know, I find that now that they’re talking, I can’t pretend I don’t know what he’s asking for as effectively!
Vanessa :: I really hope he grows out of it!
HAHA this is hilarious! Is it ticklish when he scratches you? :)<br /><br />Sean has this bad habit of scratching his own head furiously when he wants to sleep. I have been trying to stop him from doing it (because he scratches so hard he actually draws blood!) by shoving a blanket or towel his way when he starts getting sleepy – Seems to be working so far! Nursing is still his favourite way to
i had a hard time remembering your blog address so i only just read this post! meredith has mickey/minnie plushes and she rubs their ears with her fingers to help her fall asleep. morgan has a bolster, but to be honest, because she sleeps in her own room, i don’t really know what she does to self-soothe. i only know about meredith because i’ve had to wake her on occasion.
I just randomly decided to google “my son uses my elbow for comfort” to see if there is absolutely anyone who can relate. My son will be 3 at the end of January and ever since Ive stopped nursing he has found comfort in my elbow.
HI Alexus, over the years, I’ve received various e-mails and messages from different readers telling me that their child loves to grab their elbow too. You are not alone! This baby of mine is now 12 and nearly my height. He doesn’t hold my elbow any more. In fact, he doesn’t like to hold my hand 😅. I think back on those days when Mama was his world fondly.
I know it’s 11 years later, but I’m sitting here googling in hopes someone has an answer to this bizarre problem 😅 My daughter is 2.5, and the rubbing has turned to scratching and picking! It reminds me my elbows need lotion, but also, it HURTS! Did you ever find a solution, or did it just phase out in its own? My elbows are seriously raw and I’m just done at this point 🥲
Hey April. Believe it or not, i’m 21 and still rub my elbow to sleep. My mom believed for a while it was superstition. She told me as an infant my dad accidentally hit me with his elbow by my brow right above my eye. As i got older i would rub their elbow to go to sleep. Even now as a young adult if you walk in while i am asleep, you would see me resting with my hand on my elbow or near it.
I realized I am not the only one. My daughter does it to my elbow too but Not only stroking but also nibbling and biting my elbows! I thought its something I should pay medical attention to. She is really obscessed with my elbow which is irritating and hurting since I am pregnant. Sometimes I would scream in pain I almost feel my skin peeling off by her bite. I find it funny and this activity makes us even closer with each other.