My dear Noey, my beautiful son,
You stand on the cusp of turning 4 years of age, your birthday being just over a month away. You have grown up a lot since we moved into the second half of the year. You’ve matured and grown, and you’re a little boy now. No longer a baby or a toddler but a proper boy in your own right. I know you can’t wait to finally be FOUR, just like the rest of your classmates. It probably can’t come soon enough.
Your Mummy here though can’t quite believe that you’re almost four already. It would mean that I’ve been at this parenting gig for four years too, and I can’t quite believe that either, because I’m still learning new things every day.
Like today.
Today we brought J, your classmate home with us today, because his parents weren’t able to pick him up and asked me to help out. I don’t mind picking him up and babysitting him, even giving him lunch before his parents pick him up. If I do hesitate, it’s because of you. Because I know that you actually aren’t that fond of him. Somehow when you play together, you always end up getting hurt. He is bigger and stronger, and you, well, tend to be at the receiving end whenever things go wrong.
It happened again on this occasion. I wasn’t watching you boys at that point so I don’t know exactly what happened, but from what I could gather, you boys were playing with your die-cast cars and you used yours to crash into the one in J’s hand. (I really don’t know why you must always play this way with crashing and banging!) I am guessing he retaliated by hitting you on the forehead with his car, because the next thing I knew, you were in tears. You were in tears and I could see that it hurt, and my heart ached for you. While I didn’t think J should have hit you in the head, I did think that you were also at fault for starting the aggressive play in the first place, and I told you so.
You were mad, you were. And being mad, you said all kinds of angry things, describing unkind things you wanted to do to him. I told you that you shouldn’t, that it wasn’t the right way to react, that he was a guest, that he had apologised. You weren’t happy. “But why?” you asked me. And your question reminded me of what was important. I was telling you how to react, and superficially why you should be doing so. But at that point, I pulled you on my lap, and told you – “Because God tells us to forgive.” And I spent some time explaining to you how Jesus loved and Jesus forgave even despite the suffering he went through, till death on the cross. We also spent a short time praying that God would help you forgive.
And you understood. You nodded solemnly and hopped off my lap to go and play. There were no more tears, no more nasty words. You left J to his devices and you sat down nearby to play quietly on your own for a while. I was SO PROUD of you, and so incredibly grateful to God for helping you through the difficult moment.
I must also say that while I was proud of you, but I wasn’t proud of myself. God gave me the inspiration at that point to get through to you, but I instantly felt guilty for not doing more on other previous occasions, or seizing more opportunities to teach you God’s word and His ways. Forgive your Mama. I’m only human, and often I get sucked in by the day to day and neglect the more important type of teaching and training that I should be doing. But I’m not going to forget now – I promise you and Meips that. I guess that’s why I’m writing this down here. To remind me of my purpose at this time when I am enjoying this tremendous opportunity to spend time growing up with you both.
I love you so much. Don’t you ever forget that.
Love,
Your Mama
Thank you for sharing this Veraday 😀