Ah, the pacifier.
With inconsolable newborns, you fight the little tikes to just take the pacifier — and stop using you as one! Then as toddlers, you fight them to stop using one. Poor kiddos. I wouldn’t blame them for being confused.
Both my kids have used the pacifier, with vastly differing experiences. Noey took the pacifier as an infant, but when he was about 8 months old, he suddenly decided that he didn’t want it any more. That was all well and good since it meant that I didn’t need to wean him off it. Unfortunately it didn’t mean that he didn’t need something to soothe him to sleep. Rather, it was that he wanted ME to soothe him to sleep. But that is really another story for another time.
Meips took to the pacifier really well — too well, in fact, since she’s now nearly 2.5 years old and we’re struggling to wean her off it. She LOVES her pacifiers. Yes, that’s pacifiers in plural, because she likes to go to sleep with two of them: one in her mouth, and the other in her hand. She uses the one in her hand to stroke her face. It’s most bizarre, and I have no idea how the second pacifier came into the picture though it is definitely my helper’s doing.
Anyway, we were happy to let her continue with her two pacifiers since she only really uses her pacifiers when she needs to go to sleep. Admittedly, she’d pounce on any loose pacifier she sees lying around the house with the glee that comes from seizing upon forbidden fruit, but by and large, we don’t let her have it too often. I was wondering how I was going to get her off it though.
And then, as it happened, she had a big fall a couple of weekends ago.
She was apparently playing at the playground — under Daddy’s watch — when she tripped over her slippers and knocked her face into the side of the stairs of the play structure. I wasn’t there to see it, but I saw the aftermath: A scrape on her chin, a big gash on the inside of her upper lip, and most worryingly, bleeding around her front two teeth. We panicked a bit when we realised she could not bite with her front teeth without suffering some pain and rushed her to the Dentist. There we were told that it didn’t seem too serious, but there was probably soreness and while her teeth were a bit loose, there was a good chance they might firm up again after some time. “What about her pacifier?” we asked. “This is probably a good time to wean her off it,” was the reply.
Gulp.
We were not very strict about it in the first week, but when we realised that her teeth stayed wobbly, we realised we had no choice but to go cold turkey.
The first few days did not go well. Meips kept asking for it. When she was turned down by one party, she asked another. There was lots of whining and some tears. And, it took her AGES to fall asleep because she kept talking and wasn’t able to settle down. Her naps have been really late and on two nights, she had to be glared to sleep by Daddy. It was actually really funny when she fell asleep on the second night with her hands covering her face!
Things are better now. She still asks for her pacifier at night, but she doesn’t persist. The good thing about this girl is that she does listen to reason, but only if it makes sense to her. We repeatedly told her that she couldn’t have her pacifier because it would hurt her teeth. “It’s not painful! See!” she said at first, tapping her teeth with mock bravado. But when she continued to resist tooth brushing (she really HATES it) and shied away when we cleaned her front teeth, she knew she wasn’t going to win the argument.
Tonight, she fell asleep fairly easily. There was talking and attempts to do forward rolls on the bed, but not for very long, and I didn’t need to glare her down. So that’s probably an improvement! It’ll be a while before she stops asking for the pacifier altogether, but hopefully, we’ll get there sooner rather than later.
Oh, and her teeth? They feel much firmer since we’ve gone the no-pacifier route. Yay.
If you’ve had to wean your child off the pacifier and have some good tips, please share! I’d love to have some alternatives to keep up my sleeves in case cold turkey doesn’t turn out so well!
Haha she can be glared to sleep? Gosh I wish I could do that too! Anyway, sounds like she's a sensible little girl, and will wean herself off the pacifier soon. Good luck! 🙂
Haha, yes, my husband sternly told her he didn't want to see her eyes open and continued staring at her to make sure she complied. After squeezing her eyes shut for a period of time, she fell asleep! Only because it was past her bedtime too. She's only scared of her Papa. Doesn't work with me!
Some pacifier weaning tips I have had/tried in the past was to 1. make a small snip on the teat so it becomes flat and deflated when sucked, 2. rub chilli on it 3. rub lime/lemon juice on it 4. (someone tried this and apparently it worked for their girl) throw it together into the chute and declare with much celebration that she is a BIG girl now… then remind that it has gone in to the chute
Thanks for sharing! Maybe #4 would work on Meips. She's always really eager to say she's a big girl!
One way I have heard to wean them off is to put it on a helium filled balloon, let the balloon go, so they see it flying away. Tell them pacificer has flown away and will not come back. Will try that one on Jonas.
Hi Shermeen, thanks for coming by and giving me a tip. That is the cutest idea ever!
My kids didn't use pacifiers, but when it came time to wean them off the bottle, #1 got told that a lizard stole it, and that was that. #2 was given a deadline to give it up – when the day came, we unceremoniously chucked it in the trash. End of story. I think cold turkey is best. They get over it faster.
I still have the bottle to contend with with Meips. Cold turkey actually seems to be working with her, so I'm glad!
First time commenting:). My son loved his pacifiers but when he turned 18 months, I just told him the pacifier will make his growing teeth look ugly so we have to throw it away. He saw me throwing it down the bin and accepted it as that. No fussing during bedtime and he never asked for it again. But he's still on his bottle for morning and night even though he's already 5. We've
Hi Yvonne, thanks for coming by and leaving a comment! Wow, your son's amazing to have taken the disappearance of his pacifier so well! Actually, I erm, used the bottle till I was 6 😛 Let him enjoy it!
Oh I feel you! We just recently weaned our 3yo son off the pacifier and surprisingly it went better than I thought it out be! ;)<br /><br />We did it in steps though, was too afraid of dealing with a fight each night.<br />Firstly we made sure there was a comforter on his bed – his bear Oso was his night time pal so that was good.<br />Then we kept showing him how it were the babies that used the
Hi there, thanks so much for coming by and leaving such a long comment! 🙂 You were really organised with the weaning process. A real thumbs up for that! It sounds like you planned it so well your son was able to adjust really well. Thanks for sharing! I'm sure that would be helpful for future reference.
lovely read, vday.. I chuckled out loud at various points in your post, the glaring to sleep, hands covering face and the stroking of the pacifier on her cheek… actually, that part can still continue, no?<br /><br />Vivien
Hi Vivien! The problem is that as soon as I give her a pacifier, she pops it in her mouth. I did try telling her only to use it to stroke her cheek but to no avail! So no pacifier for her!
I chuckled reading your post plus the comments! I was just so amused. I certainly have a lot to learn in this parenting gig. Really glad to read your entries. How's the cold turkey going?
Hey V! We all learn as we go along 🙂 The cold turkey is going really well actually! She hasn't forgotten about her pacifiers and would still try to ask my helper for one occasionally, but she refuses to ask me or my hubby. Probably cos she knows she won't get one from us!